June 1, 2012

It's a date ;)

In most of the Maharashtrian households, choosing a wedding date is not much of a brain cracker as the family pundit or Kalnirnay (a regional calender) decides the most important date of your life. Even then, there are a few things which you can keep in mind / suggest your wedding stakeholders while finalizing the dates.

1.       Keep your options open: Keep 2-3 dates in mind while you firm up things like Venue, Dream photographer, etc. Always ask for your most favorable date first.

2.       Day of the week: This holds high importance as majority of the Maharashtrian weddings are during the day. If you want all your friends and family to attend your function, you ought to give them a convenient day. A weekend wedding will give them an opportunity to enjoy your wedding without any apprehensions. However, if you are confident that your near and dear ones will take a day off and never miss your wedding for anything, choose a weekday. It’s a great way to save by cutting down the number of people without disappointing anybody (primarily your parents who want to invite your Aunts cousin who did not exist a few mins back! It pays to be mean sometimes :P).

3.       Season of the year: November to February is best suited for weddings. The added advantage is that there are discounts going on during the planning stage (June to September) which will save a significant amount of money. You can also get engaged in this slack period. Remember wedding essentials in this season sell like hot cakes. You need to plan early. Although, a lot depends on the climatic condition of the city you will be marrying in – Nainital will be freezing in December but cozier in April. Needless to say, stay away from rains and extreme heat for a hassle free wedding.

4.     Time: Again depends on your Punditji’s consent. What we did is; we asked the Pundit to suggest a Muhurta between 4-6pm on any Sunday in December. Here is why:
·         To avoid the expense of two meals at the pricey venue – Simple lunch (Varan-bhat-tup, batatyahi bhaji, papad, loncha, koshimbir) can be arranged at respective houses (terrace or garden area will meet your requirements easily) at negligible prices. Plus repetitive meals at the same venue become insipid.
·         A rocking pre wedding party gets over late at night and we hate getting up early in the morning coz I have seen brides, grooms and their families who get so exhausted by the evening that they just want the thing to get over!
·         You tend to bore/tire out your close relatives or distant guests who have to stick through the whole wedding at the same venue till late in the evening.
·         Get some breathing time after the rituals and before the reception starts. This time can be utilized for fun things like family portraits, cake cutting, wedding toasts, etc.
·         In the evenings, you can decorate the venue with more lights and less flowers which will turn out to be more cost effective and looks classy if done sensibly.
·         Scope to do something different than the usual Maharashtrian weddings ;) 

5.       Technicalities: Even though the dates are suggested by an expert, double check in Kalnirnay. We got dates which were on the same day as Eka dashi. The day is auspicious but most of the guests only eat typical fasting food which cannot be catered. Very rare to happen but quite possible.

6.       Do not be too finicky: We were (rather I was) one of “those” couples who had decided their wedding date in their sweet sixteen. 12-12-12 was our chosen date! The first thing I did when my mom bought the Kalnirnay in Dec 2011 was to check if it was an auspicious day. To my dismay, the only day my father (who is pretty liberal I must say) refrains to do anything auspicious is New moon day or Amavas ki raat and it had to fall on my desired date. I was literally heartbroken. But this happened to be my first lesson while gearing up for the marriage: No matter how meticulously you plan, sometimes things just won’t work out the way you imagined!! Trust me – I barely care about the date now. Every time something goes against my wish, I feel if I can be fine after accepting that my 10 year long dream is not not coming true, I can be fine with any issue.

7.       Importance: The reason why we are discussing dates in so much detail is that once the date is finalized and the venue is booked for that day, there can be no turning back. Any cancellation/reschedule has huge cost impacts. In one of my cousins wedding, we had to repay the advance for rescheduling 10 mins after paying it the first time coz the mother of the groom changed the date as she felt there shouldn’t be a wedding on a Saturday. Good sabhagriha’s (wedding venues) are rare to find, so they wisely exploit their monopoly.

I hope now you will never face any issues finalizing your wedding date. Go get started.

No comments:

Post a Comment

We love reading your comments! Do write in a word or two :)